Writing Exercise 2 -- A Sentence

[Death Dark]

Writing Exercise 1 isn't closed just because of this.  I encourage others to continue partaking of the exercises any number of times they feel like.  The more we have practicing this way, the more critiquing can be done all around, and the more we all can evolve as writers.


The writing assignment this time is to write a grammatically correct 250 word sentence.  Going over's fine, but knowing when to stop is more important.  It doesn't have to be exactly 250 words, but it's the goal to set.  This is partially a test of your knowledge of language mechanics, but also a test of creativity.  Try to avoid lists and other easy-outs.


My sentence (previously written, 250 words):

As flame cascaded down around us, the dark silhouette of a woman in ornate dress stood up from Solum’s side, the fire within her dwarfing the fire without, matching her master’s fury, and then she was upon me, bearing down as if the very weight of Death itself – I was forced to block the inevitable blow, if only to save myself, but such an action proved futile as her very hand pressed heavily against my arm, forcing it into my chest – I was taken off guard, as her insurmountable beauty glared down at me, and she swiftly and decisively struck at me, leaving me unable to stop the blow, thus allowing her to bestow me with her touch, cold and alluring, and at once I felt her poison, her power, setting in, leading me to my inevitable doom in this fiery coffin I so happily made for myself, as if to remind me that I had offended her Master, had threatened his life, had put him into the utmost danger that he would rely upon her to redeem him, to save him, to make sure They would always be; at least here, in this moment, dying this way, I would be able to fade into oblivion witnessing, one last time, beauty, grace, death incarnate – the creation of an enemy that I realize now I had no means of defeating, and that had every means of defeating me, so now I lie down to rest forever, the victory his . . . hers . . . Theirs.

[Blasphemic Reaper]

I'm not trying to sound like a jackass but that has to be a run-on sentence.

[Death Dark]

Primarily I'm linking a number of independent and dependent clauses together using commas and conjunctions.  I assure you that there's nothing grammatically incorrect about it.

For example, if you see a "--" (which appears as a solid bar) or a ";", I'm "ending a sentence," but not actually allowing the sentence to end itself.  Descriptive clusters of text and ", and" conjunctions help as well.

[Hobro]

While complex sentences are cool and all, you honestly need to decide when you're going to end a thought. Otherwise if feels like it's just dragging the thing out.

[Death Dark]

   While this is important, I will not deny, this exercise is simply to cause the writer to realize how to build large sentences, since simple sentences are easy.  By being able to write sentences that are longer and more bogged down, it takes the reader longer to read them, and "slows them down."  This is a way to create a resting point in your story.  Alternatively, shorter sentences cause the reader to shuttle through the story.  Learning to balance these effects produces more well-balanced works, and is necessary for novels.  Additionally, you can use effects from this, such as knowing when NOT to end the sentence, and drag it on for effect while still being grammatically correct.

   Further, I see this along the lines of writing poetry or song lyrics.  It's not so much what impact the piece has outside of its genre or method, but what you can do with the piece itself.  Think of it like a word puzzle, but the words have yet to be chosen.

[Hobro]

I see where you're going with the poetry and song lyrics line of thought, as they both use -something- to indicate an end in meaning/of a thought, whether it be capitalization or something along those lines.

[Clockwork Pyrite]

When am I going to need to write a sentence that is 250 words long; completely ridiculous idea you have here, DD.

[Death Dark]

   When would you need to be able to lift multi-dozen pound barbells/dumbells in practical situations?  You won't.  However, the exercise you gain from doing so will condition you for more commonly applicable purposes.